5

Autumn Break, again!

First Friday of Autumn Break was well spent in someones smokey-apartment, wheezing around in a fog of... whatever it was. A very pleasant way to spend a Friday if you ask me, lots of funny people from Bergen. A girl I talked to was wondering if she'd ever met me before, I kind of got the feeling like we had met - and she asked me if I had any friends in the Folk-Music business. I said no, and then I went behind a corner to laugh until my contacts wiggled.

I also talked to an electrician, he was going to Trondheim to study to become an Electro-Engineer, and two of the Bergenese were attending "Noroff" artsy-fartsy school. They studied music-stuff, and were going to see Dreamtheater tonight, I thought that was kind of cool.

At some point I manage to fall asleep in the kitchen, sort of half-sitting over the kitchen counter, wrapped in blankets. Some time later I wake up in a sofa with a poodle (still dressed, mind you), I thought that was fairly odd, but the poodle was very nice, and it didn't snore or fart or anything. I fall asleep and then wake up again in the sofa, this time with Liv-Elin next to me. It was all very confusing.

We manage to stumble home to Mari's apartment at around five in the morning, we all fall asleep almost the moment we get there, but I'm very cold. At nine I wake up, write a note and leave. I heave myself on some unknown bus and find myself going off again at a whole different place, not really sure where, but there were trees and a man in a coat with an umbrella. I get on a different bus, and I know it's going the right direction, only to go off at the correct stop to discover that the tram is not arriving for another twenty minutes. So I walk a fair distance, cold and feel rather bamboozled by the public transport system. I get on the tram as it finally stops in front of me. On board, the faces around me are as cold and quiet as me, some cases are even worse, shivering and groaning and I can't help but feeling very very sorry for them.

As I get off, a guy smiles, and says "Good Night" to me. I think that fairly made my day, and I wave at him.
A picture of Dreamtheater, lololol.
2

Laaanguages!

Norwegians are getting in business trouble for not being good enough when dealing with other cultures. Apparently Norwegian companies loose contracts, credibility and sometimes even get the wrong stuff - meaning, basically, that they order one thing and a monkey-eyed-flipper-scoop-with mounted lazer-socks arrive in the mail.

The government, is apparently, extremely worried and grown-ups are advised to sign up for evening classes and such to improve their skills. What which did concern me a little was the dinky paragraph at the very bottom with a comment about how the future generations would handle it. The curriculum for students from 12 years and up have just been completely redone, and, ironically, lots of language has been removed out to prior... other things. Not sure what that would be, but less language, over all, being replaced by... Something.

And how exactly can anyone be worried about the language and cultural understanding of todays kids? Over the internet your kids meet at an average a hundred different cultures each month (depending obviously) and learn from it. We are surrounded by so many languages and cultures that I'd rather say it'd be a problem to tell them a part rather than knowing they exist. Hello Globalized future! Good bye lost in translation!

... One problem could actually be that in the future we're all just going to say:
"Hi, How r u??! WTB OTFH? I gt 2 many, ned 2 get rid of dem, lol"*
So, there'll be no cultural differences, and... And... er... Where was the problem again?
I forgot! Have a nice day!
* Translation:
"Hello, how are you doing? Do you want to buy an oxygen tank for your house? I have got plenty, and at a reasonable price, too! Hehe"
2

Attention for the Hors D'ouvres

What can your dog eat, and what can it not eat?
I found this article at WikiHow so read that for the in-depth reasons and symptoms.
Here's my brief summary of what you must not feed your dog:

1. Chocolate
2. Caffeine
3. Alcohol
4. Onions and Garlic
5. Macadamia Nuts
6. Grapes and Raisins
7. Avocado
8. Yeast Dough
9. Raw/uncooked Meat and Eggs
10. Milk
11. Xylitol

:O Cleo sure needs a new diet from now on!


May 17th Dessert. Éclairs, chocolate, custard, strawberries and seigdamer.
2

September music!

Can't believe it's September already, or, more accurately; that September is soon over and done with! Time sure disappears, spend it wisely.

Well, as I said, here's the music:

Decepticons - Ugress
Shadows and Doubts - Ugress
Transformers Theme - Mutemath
Will You Please Be There For Me - The Reindeer Section
Raindrop - The Reindeer Section
Offshore - Chicane
Saltwater - Chicane
Close to You - Carpenters
Energy 52 - Paul Okenfold
Coffee and Cigarettes - Augustana
Hard Rain - Shout Out Louds
Walnut Tree - Keane
Colder - Travis



In other news, I'm going to walk the dog, and I'm done with the wretched homework, and I've joined Facebook :(
So if anyone feel like sending me Anthrax please do, because I feel ashamed, and these songs can't fix it. But Irritating Noises by Bent can, as always.

I gave up my super powers so we could be together
But I didn't suit your world then I kissed you so you wouldn't remember
And I love you, little baby, but I can't take the silent pauses
I like the orange glow but not the irritating noises.

*hops up and down* Apple crumble!
4

At the dentist

She's wearing a hijab I notice, and it's one of the very first things I notice too. I don't know why that matters, all I know is that I wont get any hair in my mouth and that she's covering her hair to respect her God, a win - win.

However, even if I don't raise my brows at her, many others do. As a matter of fact, I am more interested in that the lamp which is lighting up my mouth is of a brand called "Delight" and that her nimble hands work strategically and accurately over my set of dubloons. She must've had top-grades to get here, and it provokes me that people are still so crude as to question her position. There is a lot of racism in Norway.

Just by crossing the border to Sweden you will find twice as many coloured (if I am allowed to use that word) - and that is one of the other problems. Well, not the Swedes (not all the time) but the fact that words and expressions that has to do with races are all taboo. Segregation in any form - no matter how innocent - is being moulded into an impression of always being fuelled by hate.

By declearing words and situations as ways of racism - it enhances the ridiculous "differences" between people. The cartoon-character Tintin, which has been around forever with his little yappy dog is now calling back and aborting all future printing of one of the older albums. This particular story is set at an island where the "black" natives are displayed as "dumber" and "below" the more "powerful" "white". All of this caused by some silly student from Belgium that reported it as a white-dominating propaganda.

How saddenly pointless, by calling forth this as discrimination the cleavage between our wonderfully mismatching tits is rapidly increasing. I, for example can't hit Marius 'with the cloak' without it being "hate-violence" seeing he's Korean. Meaning of all stupid things, that seeing his skin is different from mine -my aggressive behaviour is fuelled by his "difference" and my "prejudice".

Sooner of later we are going to have to face the fact that refugees and other people from different cultures that want to live in Norway shouldn't be expected to leave all their traditions behind when coming here. It is part of their identity - who they are! All I demand is that they learn Norwegian, just like I would learn Arabic or Sankrit or Greek or Mandarin if it was me. Other than that we don't have the right to require much more of them, and in particular - we can't force their religion and culture off them.

You can take a girl out of the trailerpark, but you can't take the trailerpark out of a girl.
7

Hungover

The day after! What a powerful word, what a resolute waste of space.
One wakes up with a lust to die and spend the entire morning having quite similar urges.
The worst bit must be the dimness, that reality is shakily displayed through a film of confusion and pain. And cold. Goosebumps and a vocal chord that smells like cigarettes, not that I have been smoking, but everyone else has.

Hair has a horrible texture, like someone has had it down their throat and chewed on it.
It carries a beer scent, something much like hairspray, shoes, smokes and something bitter, it makes me want to burn it off. The heat would be refreshing too, in this cold.

I don't bother eating anything but a tomato, and I go to school still wearing last night's makeup - and all that's left of the beautiful, curled hair is a pathetic knot.
I'm sensitive to light, to sound, so fragile and tired - though most of all freezing cold. I had three hours of sleep, and now look like I fell from the moon in a bag of dead cats.

Turns out that I had written "Slave to the Rave" on the arms of anyone within reach. The other students look about as fresh as I do and have "Slave to the Rave" written up their arms, breath like deceased sea-urchins. God knows who gave me a permanent marker, a ridiculous idea. I try to look innocent, but it's kind of transparent - who else would do such a thing?

The teachers are nice, no loud noises, no double syllables, just simple, slow-paced tasks. They are too difficult, we want to sleep.
From Italy, in a mentioned state.
2

The life of Cleo

Today I tried to lie in the chair of our all-time favourite rottweiller, Cleo.
It made creaking sounds as I curled up on the ripped leather - the stuffing getting squeezed out of its various exits as I did. The chair is parked in the hall, so that whenever someone enter the house - she will be the first one to know. She usually greets you by spreading her legs and giving it all a good wash - just then to smile at you and wag her tail with mellow enthusiasm.



Depends who you are of course, she's a people-person, and she knows what kind of people she should wag her tail to.
It really depends on a persons rank in the food-chain, you know. For the sake of most people, she doesn't even get out of her chair, but she always wags that tail, no matter who it is.
For mum and step-dad, grandparents, long-gone siblings, aunts, uncles or any other rare species she'll explode out of the leather like a jet-furball and wriggle around the floor, erupting long whines and penetrating barks. She would look at them with crystalline eyes, smile from yoda-ear to yoda-ear and become soft as a living room cushion.

Of course, lying in her chair, and feeling much like a pineapple trying to fit into a paper envelope - I realize why she is so selective about her attention. Someone has opened the front door and is letting a draft in, to be honest I'd much rather lie here (most uncomfortably tangled up with my own body parts) and listen to the vast, odd and mysterious sounds of my own digestive system.

Much like meditation, neck-pains, the other strange burp being cramped out of me after the other, and then a strange contemplative stare creates a film over my eyes, a mild apathetic warmth spreads and suddenly a peculiar urge to scratch behind my ears with my toenails appear.
2

Imagine if it all fell down!

From www.DesignSponge.Blogspot.com

I was peacefully wiping dust and washing the large glass shelf at work today. Behind it is a grand mirror and there's spotlights all over it so all the wineglasses, carafes, vases, bowls and colourful glass plates sparkle immensely. It is quite a sight.
Well I was standing on a ladder, wiping this repulsive ranbow-spew-coloured glass plate, mainly while thinking of other things when a little girl and her mother walked past the store. They were walking hand in hand, her mother wanted to speed up, but the girl was walking slowly, pacing steadily past the store - taking it all in with her amazed gaze.
Before passing it entirely she stopped and looked up at her mother real serious and said; "Tenk hvis alt dette falt ned og knuste på en gang! Da ville det vært veldig farlig å gå der". Her mother just nodded, eager to get moving, and then they disappeared, the girl still sucking in everything she could from the shelf before disappearing.

I just thought it was funny how caught up she was in the consequence of the disaster.
"Think if all of this fell down and smashed at once! Then it would've been very dangerous to walk there".

Fascinating!
2

Tadaa! Suit- man

At the mall where I work there is this giant foodstore, and everytime I'm there, this very happy guy in a suit is mopping the floor. He smiles so broadly I am afraid this one time he will snap in two, and his eyes have become tiny slits from all the smiling - it is a wonder he can see at all!

He has what most people lack these days, at least in Norway, he is proud of his work! He does what he do with dignity! And everyone be damned to get up from their complaining arses and respect that. He probably knows that his job (mopping the floor in a big store) is not atop the foodchain - but it doesn't appear to have any effect on him.

-and in a suit! What a fantastic appearance! We all have lots to learn from him, especially how to smile like that.
2

Firefly, Sharpen Up

Grapefruit, Passionfruit & Yerba Maté

Attention drifting? Little grey cells all out to lunch?
Focus your mind with our all-natural Sharpen Up
formula. Tangy grapefruit and passionfruit,
buzzing with herbal extracts. Hello brain.

Contains Siberian Ginseng, Clever bits.


That's what I had to drink yesterday. If anyone know what Yerba Maté is, please tell me, I have strange blue spots on my feet, and frothy liquid is starting to pour from them.
2

Yes and I realize it's been ages

What a lazy bum I am!
Here's a picture of Liv-Elin holding what we ate at Granittrock last saturday. We saw CC Cowboys and Big Bang, was funky - though it was really cold :(
3

Caramel cream!





aah, just kill me! Now!
3

Hello Skjalg!


I AM WATCHING YOU! ahahhahahah!!!1
3

How to be a better person

Don't you just love people?
I know I do!
Well, sometimes I hate them a bit, but there are loads of people that I like, and they are good people that can set an example to anyone.
So, here, now you learn how to be a better person - so that I can learn to like you too!

1. Listen - nod, smile, laugh. At least pretend like you care.
2. .... Hmmm

No, that about sums it up.
5

Mother of invention, the underdog

In Norwegian class at school this semester, we have quite a big assignment about literature. We are set to read from 2-3 novels by one Norwegian author, or 2-3 novels by different Norwegian authors about the same theme. We are then to interpret, explain, analyze and by all means rip the books apart with words on a giant paper we are going to write about it. And I mean giant.

So, I have had some difficulty picking what authors I want to read, and I am running out of time on making a decision. There are many good authors out there, even good Norwegian authors, but at the moment I am not really that inspired - not with reading, writing Or drawing for that sake. I am trying to focus, but all I do is I pick things up and then fiddle with them a bit before putting them down again only to glare with an uninterested intensity at them.

Of course this draught happens every now and then, and only movies, music and literature is what which can kick my inspiration back into action, and everything will be sunny and simple again. So I was thinking, and only hypothetically; that perhaps if I did it well enough, I could invent a Norwegian author, three great plots and play around with them as I liked - if there's something I wouldn't understand, or if I ever got stuck - I could just mould it into what I want it to be like! I mean, I could come with the most deep interpretations, spout as much shit as I would like - and basically be free to do with it as I like.

Not would it just be a) exciting, b) challenging and by all means c) rewarding (if I can do it), but it would also be d) a great inspiration and something I could learn something from!

With a bit of internet-magickz, perhaps I could forge a bit of a story!

It's only a thought, but you know, maybe it'd be fun!

Cleo is wearing a funny corset to prevent her from licking her wounds
0

Ka-plouchie!

Today I removed the cobwebs from my bike, rolled it down the gravelled path and out on the road in front of my house. As I treaded down for the first time and attempted (in vain) to steady it - it engulfed me that this was indeed very difficult. I changed gear and continued down the road, which went more easily after a little while, but when I started to climb up the hill - the bike continued to be impossible with me.

Minutes later, having given up on the bike with thighs like guitar-strings and a bouncy death-pace to my trot, I suddenly realized that one of my tyres were flat! How breathtakingly annoying!

When I come home, I will smash my face in with a shovel and then I will smash the bike, with a spork, for that extra sporky-painfulness.
Back to Top