"OH DEAR GOD NO," Bush exclaims. "That's terrible!!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, head in hands. Finally, the President, devastated, looks up and asks, "How many is a Brazillion??!"
You're reaching back
To something that you never had
It's time to draw the line
To draw the fire
Why'd you never know
The time to let go
The time to move aside
To let it slide
To let it slide
Ai ai ai! Here it goes again. October has rushed by like pre-school on sugar - and we wont see it again until next year!
Though may I take advantage of this occasion to tell you that little-brother Torstein got awarded with a crown for being his schools "Mr. Halloween" on Saturday?
Well I just did. So now you know. Even without your consent. He was dressed up as a pirate, it looked very nice.
The most difficult thing about Halloween is decide what to dress up like, so to lighten your burden - here are my suggestions!
A cloud or a sheep
1. Draw curls on your body with a permanent marker
2. Cover yourself in some transparent glue
3. Roll yourself in cotton
4. put a lamp on your head as a sun/draw on a black nose.
1. Paint yourself green
2. Put needles into your skin, all over yourself
3. Wear a pair of Mexican shades
4. Be a part of hot, desert scenery! RRrrrriaaaah!
1. Get a keg of beer, some mud and a smelly puddle of seawater, stir thoroughly.
2. roll around in the puddle while braiding your facial hair together with the hair on your head.
3. Wear a horned helmet and nothing else but rusty underpants and wooden clogs.
4. Now you will both look, and smell - like a viking.
Back in our old street
safe from the noise that's
falling around me
and we'll release this town from the people
who are trying to knock it down
And only the city lights will brighten the night sky
and there will be no sound
open the bars and
open the markets
open the banks and
open the churches
And we'll release this town from the people
- Keane "The Night Sky" ("Money raise for the UN" 2007)
But when I think about it
I don't see how you can
You're aching, you're breaking
And I can see the pain in your eyes
It's as everybody's changing
And I don't know why.
- Keane "Everybody's changing" ("Hopes and Fears" 2004)
I don't know your thoughts these days
We're strangers in an empty space
I don't understand your heart
It's easier to be apart
We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in a another time
We might as well
We might as well be strangers
- Keane "We Might As Well Be Strangers" ("Hopes and Fears" 2004)
a song that makes me think of many things!
TORA -Temporally Ordered Routing Algorithm
Torah - the Five Books of Moses
TOra - a database administration and development tool
Tora! Tora! Tora! - a 1970 movie about the Attack on Pearl Harbor.
Tora Olafsdotter, better known as Ice is a DC Comics superheroine from a past age of the Justice League
Tora - Japanese word for tiger
Seen something much like this in my blog before? I think you might have, yes. Maybe even twice.
Lovers at a great divide
why d'you laugh
When I know that you hurt inside?
And why d'you say
It's just another day, nothing in my way
I don't wanna go, I don't wanna stay
So there's nothing left to say?
- Keane "Nothing in My Way" ("Under The Iron Sea" 2006)
it's a bad dream, no-one on my side
i was fighting,
but I just feel too tired to be fighting,
guess I'm not the fighting kind.
Wouldn't mind it
if you were by my side,
but you're long gone,
yeah you're long gone now.
- Keane "A Bad Dream" ("Under The Iron Sea" 2006)
Well it wasn't so much of a bad dream, well - it was utterly disturbing and also a bit frightening, but I don't think that 'bad' is appropriate, disgusting maybe. Just so you're warned, this is a dream I've dreamt and it is pretty icky and very sick*, so if you choose not to read on, then that's fine!
We are being chased by ninjas, some are dressed in tight black, and some in red - after falling through the floor we land in a pool with a massive splash and sink slowly to the bottom. Ninjas everywhere. We have drawn our swords, but the thick, devouring liquid is slowing us and it seems as an eternity before our feet touch the bottom of a very pleasant white-tiled pool.
The water disappear.
From above and from all directions - ninjas are plunging at us, and I strike at random, blood is pouring from my wounds as I gush at the enemies, back to back with you. I don't know who you are, but I know you, and you are with me - and I am so glad I am not alone.
At a certain point the amount of ninjas has decreased, we are protecting a little boy child as we run along the bottom of the empty, narrow and deep pool - no exits. It is like a porcelain maze.
A man with a face comes out from behind a corner as we stop for a second to catch our breath, and by saying he has a face I mean that he is not wearing a red or a black ninjamask - but I don't know him. Actually he looks like that Goldeneye badguy, kind of poorly animated, just like in the N64 game, we instantly know that he's the evil genius behind it all. His bodyguards just fall over without much heavy work, and then it's the boss' turn.
I don't know why, but it is me who must kill him, and I am standing there with a sword held tight in both hands trying to think of how it is most easy to kill a person. His hands are tied in the back, and he's kneeling down on the tiles, it is more like an execution, and still I can't think of a good way to let him go. For some reason I am filled with sympathy, I just want him to die quick and painless, and I'm thinking and thinking of how to make him do so.
Absurdedly I end up cutting my sword into his face, from the roots of his hair and down to his chin. But he doesn't want to die. there is very little blood, but I can see everything inside his skull, it splits open with ease - even though I am doing it slowly, and with a not particularly sharp sword. He doesn't die, he doesn't scream. He is kneeling, eyes popping out of his face in pain - and I just have to continue, because the more I linger the slower he will die and I don't want him to die slowly. I slice his face into thin slivers, and suddenly there's all this blood again, gushing from his mortal wounds, but still it takes time, and veins and organs are pulsating inside the slices.
But then, he dies. And there is blood and confusion and the person I'm with is yelling at me - we need to get out! We need to hide the body! You must hide the body! Quickly!
We have killed loads of people, but this one, the most brutal, the most horrible and traumatizing - he must be hidden. No-one must find out that we (I) have killed the poorly animated Goldeneye Bad guy. I don't panic, I never panic, I wrap him up - and I walk down the street. People are giving me stares, but I pretend not to notice. The body, still warm, is flung over my shoulder, but I have no trouble walking.
In fact, I have difficulty walking heavy enough - I am floating - and the citylights in the distance are swelling like balloons in pastel colours - if you have ever watched city-lights with tears in your eyes, or without glasses, then you know what I mean. And I float up to the sky, trying to walk on the ground, but I can't.
I woke up and thought my alarm was 'ringing the cows in' or 'calling the peasants for dinner' - or really, whatever sick excuse I was making up for it not to concern me and my sleep.
*I'm so crazy I'll never need drugs to make me cool. Lucky, lucky me!
Naturally, as more people come together - like they do online, one gets a chance to share exactly how bored one is - with the rest of the world. I don't know exactly what relevance this has to other people, but one of the top most used words on the web is actually "bored", with "lol" still as a top favourite.
Why do we get bored? Because we have so much to do? Or because we have so much to choose from, and some many alternatives that if we have already thought about doing some of them they already bore us?
Then what is the cure to boredom? Obviously not the internet, so far all that its given us is a meaningless amount of flashgames and free ringtones. Personally I don't see how this is relevant at all, maybe it can stall our boredom a little, or in the best cases spark off some creativity - but rarely it can be a cure. It's more like a time-killer, a space-waster.
Well either way, here's your proud selection, here's the crown essentials of boredom-fighting from all our online friends!
is it not grand?
is it not spectacular?
is it not way too big?
is it not entertaining?
Why do I begin a question with "is it not.." - do I not make the question more difficult to answer that way?
I suppose I do!
Quite stupid, isn't it?
But splendid indeed! Now all this sad blog need is some more glitter, and some more snow! Because Christmas is really really close and some of us just simply can't wait to pimp out their blogs to a dangerous extent. Something which is very righteous for Christmas time. Indeed. Bring on the glitter! Strap on the shades, we are in for a sight*.
*for those of you who can see.
Actually this day is the day when I recommend the song "Ever Present Past" from Paul McCartney's newest album "Memory Almost Full".
This song has an upbeat, Beatles' ring to it (surprise surprise) and an odd, electronic touch - strange as it may seem, this actually works well. And though he can't write, nor read music (notes) he doesn't have to, because he's filthy rich - and he makes this song work anyway! It is almost indie-like, very brit.
Have a listen, see if you can think of anything to prove me wrong with, but this, young sir, is a poppy tune, and - most are doomed to like it!
Yes! Finally another magical Chinese fairytale* by one of my favourite directors. The genius behind my all-time favourites House of Flying Daggers and Hero, Yimou Zhang. Absolutely fabulous. For your own sake I suggest you tune in your expectations for this film differently than for the other similar films, this has very little action, and is mainly a drama. Also it is a whole lot more slow-paced and heavy than many of the famous Asian films, like Ang Lee's Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
Curse of the Golden Flower is without an ounce of comedy a very problematic movie, but with so much splendour, and with a cast of hundreds of people - a pure 111 minutes of visual pleasure.
Obviously it overwhelmed me with all the intense impressions, the dense colours, the emotion and the beautiful scenery. Completely as expected there were immense complications and a tangled web of a story, intricately untangling itself across a most spectacular cast and some very detailed costumes.
I'm not going to go in to the story, because much like the end scene in Bin Jip (by Ki-duk Kim) it makes me cry just to think about it. Seriously.
By all means it was almost impossible to understand, most likely because there is so much beauty all at once that you have to be superwoman to get it all in at once. But with a bit of afterthought and a bit of reasoning it is not half as confusing as Hero, so I see this as an improvement plot wise. Clearly, Yimou Zhang has an issue with creating tragedies, and he really needs to make things a bit more upbeat, in my personal opinion. Though still this is not reason enough to dislike it, I suppose even though he over-fills his 'forbidden-love quota', and completely blows the 'sad-music-scale' off its hinges - it's still enjoyable, it is still so professionally done that I can see it again. And that's well-tuned for you, a very fine balance there.
I obviously have to see it again. And so do you!
* You must not (under any circumstances) see this film if you think everything has to have a logical explanation to it, like "How is it possible to run up a wall like that?", "Where did the doctor's wife learn to fight?", "Where did that giant army come from?", or "How can he move so fast in an armour made of gold?" and of course you must not see this film together with anyone like that. Once you begin questioning imagination like that you should slap yourself, it is healthy with a bit of madness, a bit of detachment from your square format.
Frost this morning, and down at Elin's it was minus 5. Holy crap!
In other news there's still a lot of drama in Oslo, people have bought all the bottled water available, and similar companies like Coca cola are celebrating. As usual when there's a crisis - the people that earn from it get blamed, the number of conspiracies are striking, honestly.
VG wrote about the discovery of a dead badger in one of the water reservoirs about one hour ago, as I was to link to this article - it suddenly disappeared. Either it just wasn't true - or they are keeping something from us! This is what was written:
Død grevling i norsk vannverk
Her flyter en død grevling rundt i drikkevannet - etter at det er renset. ... Herfra har det rensede vannet lang vei i rør før det når kunden...
Dead badger in norwegian waterworks
Here a dead badger floats around in our drinking water - after it's been purified. ... From here the cleansed water has a long way through pipes before it reaches the customer...
Would have been a laugh if all of this indeed was caused by a dead badger! Not for the badger, naturally.
It would have been quite sad for the badger.
But here's my NewNorwegian (Nynorsk) essay!
I know it's ridiculous, but so was the assignment, really. Kåseri? I don't know how to!
Ungdomen og moroa i trafikken:
Menneske er, som kjent, myke trafikantar, og det er masser av tid til å utforske akkurat denne sida av dei mange utrolege eigenskapa vi har når man er i en sånn passe alder. La oss si omtrent et sted passe mellom dritungane i ungdomsskulen og de hovne ’vaksne’ på vidaregåande, ja, då er man akkurat sånn passe stor. Enten om man trivs med å bulke inn i ei barnevogn med pappas Mercedes, eller om man føretrekker å parkere oppå en stakkar gammal dame med sin nye Vespa – er lek i trafikken den store nye sysselsettinga blant ungdomen i dag.
Det fins et utal forskjellige måtar for ungdomen å leke i trafikken på, for eksempel på parkeringsplassar, trikkeovergangar, rundkjøringar –eller klassikaren, den vesle røvaren - motorvegen. Det gjeld å utnytte den nye boltringsplassen fornuftig, ta opp fleire filar samtidig imens man viftar freidig med lære-L skiltet og fis dei andre bilistane opp i frontlysa med pappas bil. Tru ikkje heller at Buss og Taxi filen bare er føreheldt kollektivtrafikken, nei nei, det er helt gale – det er jo der man skal rygge sakte mot kjøreretninga med stereoen skrudd opp til ’total hjernedød’. Andre festlige leikar er ”Elle Melle Kjedekollisjon”, ”Bro Bro Postbil” eller ”Laup frå lastebila”, alle ganske så trygge, men samtidig framifrå hobbyar.
Det faktum at man som menneske er så mjuk tillatar også leik med anna enn bare biltrafikken, ja her er muligheitene vidopne! Både trikk, t-bane og tog tillatar masse røvaraktig leik, her kan man sitte på urin stenka ukomfortable setar, stå så tett at man kan lukte folk oppunder armholene eller prate ustanselig med trikkeføraren helt til han blir djuplilla i ansiktet. Viss ikkje dette fallar i smak, er det masse å finne på langs skinnegangen og de malplasserte stasjonane. Leik i trafikken er i stadig utvikling og blir bare betre og betre ettersom man blir flinkare til å improvisere, høgdepunktet i ens karriere er helt klart når man endeleg har bestått førarprøven. Plutselig finnes det enda fleir uutforska muligheiter man kan kaste seg over, noe som ofte kan resultere i sterk dødsangst blant innbyggarane i nabolaget.
Fleire foreldre reagerer sterkt på ungdomens leik i trafikken og saman ønskje dei at staten skal sett ein stoppar for det dei kallar ”galenskapen”. Før ferien dannar dei levande lenkar rundt familie bilen imens dei skrik for å sleppe å sitje på med eldstemann som insisterer på å kjøre.
Men eg antar at tilslutt vil alle dei unge skli roleg vekk frå galenskapen, seile i en ubestemmelig fart mot å være vaksen, bruke blinkljos i svingane, vike for trafikk frå høgre og setje ei trekloss under gasspedalen. Då er tida komen for å være moden, ansvarsfull og kontrollert, og i staden for å sprengje rundt og leke med leddbussane, skal man disponere energien ved å skjelle ut musikken på radioen, imens man ustanselig tråklar sakte langs E18, i smog og tut. I det fjerne kan man kanskje høre sonens bil som susar over ei bru i livstruande fart, med alle venane hans slengande etter på eit lasteplan, skrikande og hoiande, galne, men lykkelige. Og man forsøkar å irritere seg, fordi det er uansvarlig, og farleg – men det er kanskje nettopp derfor, nettopp derfor, at man blir sitjande og smile skjeft i smug i staden.
But today they played non-stop sad songs by Keane and Coldplay! Someone has had their heart broken!
I'm going to go in there with some chocolate and a copy of the newest "Pride & Prejudice" version on DVD.
And then in the comments, someone had written:
"Jeg har hatt det spillet og det er veldig bra kamp system noen filmer bra men spillmagasinet kan virkelig suge mye rart til helvete ja.."
"I have had that game and it is very good fighting system some films good but spillmagasinet* can really suck lots of strange things to hell yes.."
Couldn't really make anything out of that.
You should read the review, and you can - here. (In Norwegian)
It's like Supergrass meeting Melody Club meeting Klaxons meeting Starsailor meeting Shout Out Louds meeting happy, upbeat, beautiful music!
Songs like "The World is Outside" and "Musical Chairs" are awesome though much like tunes you might have heard before. While "Stop", "Stay the Night" and "Wrapped Up in Little Stars" are incredibly original and fun and brilliant! Must hears!
Tons of energy, an album no longer than 48 minutes but with plenty of spark! You'll be surprised how captivating and addictive it is. The variation is also extremely striking, they possess different genres and use odd sounds in their music, but still make it sound very right.
Perfect for any occasion, so versatile and well-produced you might be frightened - though still hardly revolutionary! This is where conservative brit-pop meets traditional ballads and funky jingles and loud drums, a very strange place.
In other words, the poor flapflop was not the least sufficient as a laptop anymore, and despite my intense denial and my magnetic laptop-attraction-force, I had to hand it in to the school tech-support. At first they refused to admit there was anything wrong with it, and that by just refitting windows - it would be as good as new. When I came back a few days later he was filling in this long piece of paper, ready to send it off to repairs. So he asked me (after I had given him a hard time about not listening to me before) what specific problems I had been having with my laptop.
"Well, nothing works. After I realized it was no good as a computer, I tried using it as a snowboard - not a great success to be honest. I then attempted to use it as a mailbox, a chair, a book, a teacup and a sauce ladle - non which proved successful, after this revelation, I gave it to you".
He looked scared and sent it away after I had given the flapflop a nice stroke down the rows of USB-gates and whispered it assuring words, and that it would come home safely. So seeing I am not able to post during class or any other time at school - my feed is getting drafty and the posts sparse. For this I hope you may forgive me, if things go according to plan and my delicious flapflop is returned in a week or two - things will be different around here!
My newest stop motion animation! Please tell me what you think of it :)
The only thing one should be forced to do, is to watch "Pride & Prejudice" with stunning Matthew Macfadyen.
And, listen to "Walk on the Wild Side" by Lou Reed.
The days when you would feel like something different, watch "Stardust" with sparkling Claire Danes.
And, listen to "The Man Who Flew Away" by Husky Rescue.
Mankind should do nothing but these tranquil things.Taken in Gardinia di Ninfa, Italy - Click to see previous post about this garden :)