New-Norwegian exam notes

This was written in a separate word-document during my New-Norwegian written exam.

Hmm, how come my essay hasn’t written itself? I did read the assignment, I even chose a topic, and wrote a header. Still it hasn’t been able to patch itself together without my assistance, it appears it hasn’t even tried. That might be what annoys me most about schoolwork and other uninteresting tasks. You can’t just mentally plug off and let your body do the work without really paying attention. You actually have to be present and DO the work yourself. It’s unpractical in so many ways. The guards look more than averagely bored to death, they haven’t brought anything to read or play with. Can’t believe they are just going to sit there. I wonder if the time really is just 09:15, because I’ve been drawing and reading and even had a short nap – while as we’ve only been here fifteen minutes. That doesn’t make any sense at all. One of the girl guards is so much prettier when she smiles. She should smile, she has a beautiful smile. Treasure it, girl. It’s the magic you’ve got, that smile. It really is. Maybe she does right in saving it. Bet it’s got her out of trouble more than once.

That’s why wool keeps you nice and warm, it’s because it itches, so it gets that circulation going. My theory. Getting more certain about it every time I wear wool, like today – I am wearing a giant woollen jumper and woollen socks. It’s impossible to be cold at all, or not to itch.

I was actually feeling quite happy with my text, but then I changed something – not sure exactly what. But now it’s different in a way that doesn’t appeal to me. But I don’t know how to change it back, so I can’t. Strange sensation. I don’t feel well at the moment, I feel full, yet I’m hungry, maybe I should have some chewing gum. Nam nam. I had some chewing gum. And I was right, it was nam nam. Nam nam.

It is so wonderful that the same guard as last time is using that sweet little, red lunchbox. The guard I was partial to is not here today, sadly. He had beautiful eyes.

I wonder how many kilos my head is. I just dropped it on my keyboard and rested for a bit. My essay is 829 words, It’s still two hours left. Not to worry, this will go well, hopefully. I can’t wait to go jogging. Really, I’m getting excited about it. I’m on Danish eye drops and Icelandic antibiotics, so I’m feeling so much better, and I have a voice and I have sinuses. Incredible. I’m still a little worried about the rash on my hands, I never really got to the bottom of that. Probably should go see the doctor again. But anyway, still have to ramble about getting better, because the best part of it is that I don’t have to wear glasses anymore. Weeee!! Yay yay! Man, I am SO glad I don’t have to wear glasses all the time, it’s such a burden and I prefer contacts easy! Seriously. Bah! And I don’t suit my glasses either, the way the lenses curve makes my eyes look smaller. Just like my eyes weren’t small enough already, how cruel of the cold, inconsiderate bastards.

Hmm. So all the lefse is eaten. It was better last time, same manufacturer, but different kind of lefse. This here’d be a klenning lefse, while as the other was probably made of potato, which made it slightly more moist. Which was better, to be fair.

I have now written 1 200 words of my newnorwegian assignment. The progress is incredibly slow, I’m aiming for a couple hundred more words, just to be on the safe side. If I have about three pages it should be fine. So let’s see if I can manage. I’m thinking of totally different things, like the dream I had last night. It was real funky. I would tell you about it, but it doesn’t really make any sense, I was two people at once, in a restaurant, and everything I wanted to do was done by one person, while as the things I dared or should do – was done by the other. So in a way I got my will at the same time as I behaved like everyone wanted me to. There was all this food and nice people and coconut drinks. We should go a place like that sometime. I probably should start doing more of the things I urge to do, instead of just sitting back and doing what is expected of me, or expect others to do what I don’t dare to do! It was cool to be two people at once, it was like having split personalities I suppose, but it felt a little liberating.

Ooh! I'm done now. SO SICK of looking up words and double-checking the spelling, you wnt believe it. I still can't imagine we're actually forced to write in this silly worm-tongue. Eugh! No, I say we stick to reading these darn texts in New-Norwegian, and then we just skip the whole learning how to use it ourselves part. Because it's a dead language, it's like latin, just that nobody uses it to explain the state of your kidney, or the access to your spine through your nostril. Anyway, Printing in progress! Time to go!


Witchieboobs said...

Self-writing exams should be mandatory for all schools. Especially when it comes to New-Norwegian exam, as you call it. I mean, no one knows how to write it properly, so you have to look up every single word, which limit how much time you get to write, and you also give up on looking words up halfway through. God, I hate New-Norwegian.

Hey, let's become politicians and promote our party with "We wanna get rid of silly New-Norwegian!"!

Witchieboobs said...

And can they actually access your spine through the nostrils? If so, that is really, really cool!

banko said...

Did you know exame guards arent allowed to bring anything to read or keep them occupied when 'working'?
Poor sods are supposed to just sit there for up to 6 hours straight. Salaries are semi-nice though - i got 1500,- for one day; if theyd let me bring my 'puter i might make a career of it.

Kida said...

Et hode veier ca 4 - 5 kilo. Like mye som en gjennomsnittlig vannmelon.

Det er da allmenn kunnskap... jah..

Witchieboobs said...

Jeg liker vannmelon.

Foss said...

Jeg liker vannmelon også!

Fuck nynorsk in it's stupid rompe.

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