Intersection Work Objection

The red light is glowing intently. The red man is standing completely still, both his luminous feet are firmly placed upon the black box in which he is signalling from.

"Best part of working in a pedestrian crossing is definitely not the people" says the red man stiffly. "The worst part is that I have to work, and that I have to work with.... 'that'..." The red man continues, and he does not even bother to point discreetly at the green man in the box underneath him, he rather throws a dull glance down at the currently dimmed light. The green man - though dark - is examining his own shoes with deep suspicion, occasionally kicking his left foot, awaiting a reaction.
Suddenly the red man goes black, and the green man flashes awake, beaming with upmost satisfaction.
-"I love my job" he exclaims excitedly. "I think there are so many nice things to see, and so many new things that happen all the time, I feel like I get noticed at work and that people do as I say, and that's great". The green man is looking extremely pleased, he lifts a cup of tea and winks at me.
"Notice that people will not cross the street until a few seconds after I start" the green man says with interest, and eyes the busy, grey men and women as they slowly lean forwards for a split second, before they at the same time start to scurry across the street. And he blinks, first once, then twice, then four more times, until he is dimmed out again.
The red man flashes on again, he looks even less enthusiastic than before.
-"I just wish I could work somewhere with a less noisy environment, sometimes I feel like my job doesn't really allow me to 'shine' if y'know-whad-Imean? I feel like other people really have their moments, while I'm not allowed to have them as often. I always have to wait before I'm allowed to speak up, yeah? In addition, my co-workers are all a bit dim. I wish they weren't so dim all the time." The red man finishes, he is once again frozen - glowing red, letting the cars rush past, clutching his head in his hands, looking gloom.

Azhoooooooo-hoooop!

December 4th! And I found a dancing Xmastree!

On the Phone

I am half-sleeping, half-writing on my NaNoWriMo Novel, when suddenly my phone rings. I actually manage to pick it up and say something as rude as "What is it now?" while scratching my head in an annoyed fashion.
It is my sister, she seems quite bored because she is reading for her final exams this semester.
My sister is demanding, loud, dishy, sharp as a stiff drink in the morning, loyal, though snotty, and incredibly incredibly competitive.

Sigrid: "What's that supposed to mean?"
Tora: "No, no, I was just joking" (stop calling me, you nagging antediluvian hag!)
Sigrid: "I heard Nadir* was with you this weekend?" (*this is not the real name of the person in question, and I know this person will most likely be insulted because he is named like a slick carpent-seller, and that this will create total chaos within my family, but I would still like to preserve the persons anonymous identity).
Tora: "Yes, maybe" (This is what usually triggers the phone call to my mother after talking to me, to get all the nasty details out of my vague answers to all her barbarous questions. Not to mention the part where she tells mum off, because I'm "useless").
Sigrid: "So what did you two do?"
Tora: "We went to the movies and saw Borat, had dinner at a restaurant. Haha, and when we were lying in my bed and looking at the ceiling - neither of us could see the glow-in-the-dark flowers I have up there. His eyesight is like -6.00 I have -5.50, and I thought I was bad!"
Sigrid: "hah! My boyfriend has -1.50, you are like, blind" (As she says this, I brush an imaginary dead, crisply dry maggot off my shoulder)
Tora: "Well, it's not as if I mind"
Sigrid: "Isn't he tall and skinny too?" (I think I can hear her beam with satisfaction)
Tora: "How tall is Axel?"
Sigrid: "He's 1.86... I mean, 1. 87" (I can tell it is a lie. And what a big fat lie, even adds an extra centimetre, how low is that?!)
Tora: "Nadir is 1.96, and yeah he's quite lean"
Sigrid: "Pffffft. Tall freak! Well my Axel is not skinny, he's rather pregnant. So can't beat you there"
Tora: "No, apparently not" (shaking my head, looking out the window).
Sigrid: "I calculated how much sooner than me you got yourself a boyfriend. It was 4 years, nearly on the day, even counting when our birthdays are and all".
Tora: "Sigrid, not everything is a competition". (She laughs heartily, but underneath the surface, she whole-heartedly disagrees with me).
Sigrid: "Is he going to be at our house the entire Christmas then?" (I jump, because I thought I heard a tiger growling, not my inpatient sister talking).
Tora: "No, he does have a family himself you know. But I hope he's going to be here some, yes."
Sigrid: Starts to talk about her plans for Christmas, not to mention new-years. Says something about herself. Says something else about herself, laughs maybe. Says something I have to agree with - because if I don't: She gives me the impression that she'll jump through the phone and stare me down. Laughs. Is ironic. Talks about herself some more.

I think that ends the conversation.
December 14th she'll come and blow up her suitcase in the basement. My brother pledged me to keep her away from it so he could have it instead, but we both know bloody well that she'll grab the sofa, stuff with with underwear that impossibly can fit her, throw around some random jewellery, smudge an entire crate of foundation on the bathroom sink before tossing about all the other belongings she brought. I swear people can hear her actually rigging up a bomb.

She even wears skulls in her hair.

Snowflakes

It's December 2nd!

So let's make some snowflakes!

HellOoo000OOoo

It's the very first of December!
The perfect occasion to bring out anything hideous and/or colourful, sparkling, blinking, shining, glittering and smelly. The scent is preferably to be enjoyable.

January two years ago I had been very sick and had been away from school for a month or so. I had mononucleosis (also called epstein barr ) - epstein being the nickname my loving sister gave me, along with "levra" mening "the liver". Thank you for that Sigrid.

Anyway, my loving sister, my mum and I went for a little hoobalalooba trip to London.
There we bought Christmas decorations for well £ 100 (1000,- kr), and they had been discounted with 70% already! And every year we now take out these hideous and expensive decorations, and we all love them very much.

When I woke up today, the wind was attempting to tear down my house, but I realised that even though it is an old, crooked coccoon of a building I live in, it will stand rock steady -

...... Oh no.

[We Apologize to break into this post, but your favourite blogger just got All Saints "Rock Steady" plastered to her brain. Call you back in April].

Dressed for advent

Teh blog has been x-mas-i-ified.

It's not complete of course, a few other changes will be boarding the expresstrain for tacky, sparkling and disgusting web layout in not too long. YAY!


You will also find it to be snowing here. This is because it's not snowing outside - not even in Oslo, so we have to find consolation in these 47 seconds of virtual snowflakes :)