Candied Apple-peel

1, Candied Apple-peel is actually made of skin from dwarves, soaked in honey and deep-fried in boiling cod-liver oil.

2. Cod-liver oil is actually made from the bum of bees, shaken, not stirred.

3. Honey is actually made by cods, not bees.

4. Bees grow on apple-trees, and must be de-barked every nine years to prevent cellulites.

5. Dwarves can root everywhere, just like potatoes.

6. Candied potato-peel most likely doesn't taste half as nice as candied apple-peel.

7. Cods live from eating apples, most apples come rising up from the sea at night.

8. six plus eight cods makes four times ten ninths of a half bee plus six dwarves and four halves of three sixths of a quarter of a potato.

9. Cods don't actually have livers, but they have glands.

10. There are no such thing as real apples.