It's a TRAP

I was just thinking because today is a rainy day and that’s really depressing because there used to be snow and now all there is left is kind of a cold, lumpy slush that’s salty and slippery with blackened corners of pollution spread around over the rotten leaves. And I’m thinking like – what’s this supposed to mean, right? I mean, I thought I lived in Norway for a reason, isn’t there supposed to be snow? I mean what is going on? There has to be some kind of guarantee. Like when I was born it came with my birth certificate like “You know hi and thanks for coming out, this is Norway all very nice, hope you were born with skis on because that’s how we shake it here. On your arrival we’ll guarantee you a lifetime of white Christmases, expensive public transport, no drinking liquor ‘til you’re at least 20 and when the first snow falls everybody will panic as if it hasn’t been snowing here for the last ten gazillion years. Yours truly, the Norwegian government”. I rummaged through all my drawers and pulled out everything I could find but it was all just drawings of happy homes and snowmen and other things I remember jotting down carelessly with a bit of oil paint on canvas as a mere infant and I thought – man. Dude, they have removed the evidence!
On the other hand I think maybe I was having a bit of a trip there because I honestly can’t remember using any oil paint during my childhood.


Foss said...

"Hope you were born with skis on because that’s how we shake it here."

This line should win you a comedy award.

Audun said...

Yes, I had a good laugh at that one too.

Darkkis said...

We has snow in Finland! First white christmas in years :/

mischief said...

Dude there had better be snow when I get there. All the brochures say so and I will be PISSED if there aint! *bosh*

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