Epic!

As everyone are well aware of -- the colour of epic is purple. I realized that I have a lot of epic things, I do.

Epic glitter and epic make-up remover.
An epic box.
An epic drink-stirring palm tree.
An epic buddha (that glows in the dark!) and an epic Mr. Krabs (his pants are epic at least).
An epic iPod!
And an epic toe! It might be broken, but how can you tell really?
It doesn't look correctly purple in this picture however.

God jul!

Merriest of Christmases!
4

David Hasselhoff - Rhinestone Cowboy

You asked for it.
8
I know that nobody likes my music posts, but I can't consider everyone else all the time!
GO listen! 

Oh, and this youtube comment was kind of funny:
8

Puffed Rice


Puffed rice is actually quite nice I think, it's cheap and chewy and it can be used for all sorts of things. Like pillow-stuffing, imitation maggots, navel fluff substitute, to dam up when you're having a nosebleed, and when you are in the need of cellulites and you can't wait for it and you can just stick some puffed rice under your skin right away. Puffed rice also sounds to straightforward to be real, it sounds like a codename for a drug. It really does.

Puffed rice is though very convenient when you wake up and you really want 3000 of something. Don't get me wrong here, I really, truly like puffed rice, I really do. The thing with puffed rice is though that it tastes next to nothing, but if it does taste something, it tastes I imagine what a small rodent farts in your mouth after having an alternative health enema tastes like. Especially those chocolates with puffed rice in them, though I suppose if that floats your boat I can only suggest you get another bag of those, or see someone about it. Which is fine by me, honestly. 

Also another thing is that puffed rice is just steamed rice grains that have been under a lot of pressure, someone could say that it's sort of like lumps of coal becoming diamonds. Well, it sort of isnt. It sort of just becomes slightly bigger grains of rice that sort of weighs almost nothing and that sort of doesn't taste anything and sort of lacks a purpose. It is like dropping your dunking biscuit in your hot beverage and forget about it! Because by the time you come back to get it, right - it's twice the size but it's disgusting, it is also terribly hard to get rid of. It is not as if somebody comes over with an empty cup, knocks and goes "Sorry, I ehm-- could I borrow a cup of mushy biscuit? No? You don't have any either, eh? Hmm. Well could I have some puffed rice?" That never happens, they never really ask for that. They ask tricky questions like "Where were you last wednesday? Do you know this man? Is this your Calamari?"

And what am I supposed to say to that? "Hey dude, chill man, come in and have some puffed rice!" I can't say that-- seriously!
4

It's a TRAP

I was just thinking because today is a rainy day and that’s really depressing because there used to be snow and now all there is left is kind of a cold, lumpy slush that’s salty and slippery with blackened corners of pollution spread around over the rotten leaves. And I’m thinking like – what’s this supposed to mean, right? I mean, I thought I lived in Norway for a reason, isn’t there supposed to be snow? I mean what is going on? There has to be some kind of guarantee. Like when I was born it came with my birth certificate like “You know hi and thanks for coming out, this is Norway all very nice, hope you were born with skis on because that’s how we shake it here. On your arrival we’ll guarantee you a lifetime of white Christmases, expensive public transport, no drinking liquor ‘til you’re at least 20 and when the first snow falls everybody will panic as if it hasn’t been snowing here for the last ten gazillion years. Yours truly, the Norwegian government”. I rummaged through all my drawers and pulled out everything I could find but it was all just drawings of happy homes and snowmen and other things I remember jotting down carelessly with a bit of oil paint on canvas as a mere infant and I thought – man. Dude, they have removed the evidence!
On the other hand I think maybe I was having a bit of a trip there because I honestly can’t remember using any oil paint during my childhood.
4

Feature Post: Audun: Christmas

Christmas is right around the corner, , and just like anything that is right around that all too well-known corner, chances are you'll walk straight into it. Because of this, I have been asked to provide some in-depth information about this beloved time of the year.

Christmas gets it name from the chemical element Christmasium. Christmasium has the unique property that it will radiate energy when cooled down, rather than being heated up, as is the case with most other substances. This energy is radiated as cherub-waves, which look like this:



When cherub-waves hit other particles, it first transforms into light. If this light hits particles with specific properties, such as for example the carbon compounds found in sugar, then this light will transform further into joy and happiness. This is why children often are happier than adults at Christmas, as the sugar levels in their blood generally is higher.

Origin

Christmasium is created under high pressure and temperature over 200 hectic millimetres under the surface of the earth. Since gold and diamond is created under the same circumstances, christmasium will often contain traces of these matters, causing christmasium to glow and sparkle. Arctic areas, such as the north pole, northern Norway and Finland is known have large concentrations of christmasium in the ground, and many people in these areas make a living by extracting it. Uncovering it is usually done by keeping large herds of reindeer which will dig for it with their hooves. The christmasium must then be kept warm in order to contain its energy.

Discovery

Christmas has been known to man for millennia. The first descriptions of the substance can be found in old Egyptian hieroglyphs, and there are also references to christmasium in Roman recordings of Hannibal's crossing of the Alps. However, it was not until year 643 AD that the matter was determined as a chemical element. This was done by the viking chemist Gveirdfinn Sveleson. The vikings had mined christmasium for many years before that, and it is believed that the goal of Gveirdfinn's research to was to improve the efficiency of the mining processes, as the vikings had recently begun to export it to foreign countries. The vikings called the substance «Jol», as it was stored and used in great quantities during their annual mid-winter feasts, Joleblot. Gveirfinn thus gave it the chemical name Jolium. He writes in his chemical journal; «Gvanungar heitar rakti, honungor rakjt vitjahord.» No one has any idea what that is supposed to mean, but modern linguists has said that if they were to have a wild guess, they would guess it meant something like «I once bought a spoon, and it was
bent.»

Modern name

The first mention of the name christmasium being used is found in a Catholic church book from the late 900's, where it is described that the bride was given by the groom «4 pounds of the purest christmas, kept in crates of stone filled with hot coals to contain its heavenly powers» (translated from old latin).

It is believed that as Christianity adopted the tradition of a mid-winter feast, it also adopted the use of Jolium, as the vikings did much trade with European countries at this time. The ending of the word quickly disappeared in common use, and today it is simply known as Christmas.

Merry Christmas!
Audun

Remember to visit Auduns blog at www.Dontstabmeplix.blogspot.com or www.Lamegunner.com!!
7

Legs

Having long legs is a great thing, really, I pride myself on my legs. Whenever I’m buying trousers I feel like I’m on a treasure hunt, or, a desperately hungry grandparent looking for his teeth. It’s like looking for a trampoline in a mine shaft, yeah? It’s basically not happening. You never really find the things you’re searching for. Or, actually that’s not true, I do find trousers that fit, even though they would only fit ideally on a giraffe and I have to get them from a friend at the zoo – it’s not a problem. And having long legs is really nice, I mean if you’re swimming from a sunken ship after a terrible storm you’ll reach shore faster, wont you? Yeah, because you hit the bottom sooner. It’s fantastic. And you can use them to stake for corpses whenever there’s a search on for a dead body in the river. When someone’s gaping, all purple and swollen, lying on the bottom with all the fishes – it’s hard to evade a pair of pin-point precision stalks as those I carry with me all the time.

Well, stalks wouldn’t really be correct word here, that makes it sound as if my legs are made of twigs, which they are not. They’re more like five elevator cables wound together to a bouquet of steel – though not as impressive as it sounds, but as thick as it sounds. You have to keep your career options open these days I heard, and it’s great to have natural assets like skin stilts to aid you then. You out of a job, what do you do? “Need a lift? Need an oil-rig? Look! You think I’m in deep shit, well look at you, you’re waist-deep!” Right? There’s no end to the possibilities. Or, they end where your calves connect with the heels. Heels are nice, I once wore a pair of heels, I am thinking of high heels, naturally, not some other persons heels. That’s crazy! Why did you think of that? But anyway, it was back when I was small, a child or something a bit bigger with a slyer grin, when I was in a time of my life where I grew several centimeters at a time. So when I wore heels I became taller than everybody else, it was just that when I took them off again I was still taller. And that was frightening in many ways, I still had fresh in my mind the time I looked up at door handles or could easily walk upright underneath a car, but then suddenly I had the voice of a Peruvian boxer and the beard of a sailor. No wait, I am thinking of some other time. It gets confusing in the end, when you get old like that. But my legs were longer, and so I crossed the road by only tilting my knee and I got an icecream or some green tea – I heard tea makes you stop growing. We’ll see about that.

5

Feature post: Torstein: Go go Tora Rangers!

Bonjour! Since you all appreciated the last post, I thought I might make another one!

About Tora!

This very rare and twisted specimen makes you wonder; “What was going on in His mind when He created this… this… thing?” well… either He had too much of the Absolut*, or He fell down the stairs.
Already as a 5 year old, the Tora develops the strange phenomenon; Twisted-ness.
The twisted-ness is a hormone that goes to the brain, and obtains complete control of the body. The first sign is when the Tora cuts off ONE of her pigtails. Fascinating indeed.

Now… The Tora often has family. In this case; a little brother, a bigger brother and a bigger sister. Since I am the little brother, I must say; I am lucky to have a Tora as a bigger sister, but… have you EVER tried to do your homework while you sister is sitting next to you while trying to shove an entire orange into her mouth?

Though at the bottom, the exhausted squeaky toys that Tora is using as a heart-- are lovely beings.

Sincerely, Torstein.
*Vodka
2

I thought this was quite interesting

Weird, but interesting. "Within the last 40-50 years women went from loose underwear around the thighs to tight underwear going across the middle of the buttock. Underwear that has tight elastic across the buttock limits blood flow, encouraging cellulite to form. Wearing thongs, boyshorts, or sleeping naked can reduce the impact underwear plays on cellulite's development.

Cellulite describes a condition that occurs in men and women (although much more common in women)".

 Sometimes I get very afraid of what the internet is doing to me.
6

Feature post: Torstein: Fruitcake

'ola! To make an insanely long story short; I'm Tora's little brother. Torstein. Now, like most people do, you will most likely go "OMG wtf u r named Torstein?" and I will go "Well, if you think about it, it is the coolest name ever!" I mean, it is a VERY rare name. Not in Snoreway though, I'm only waiting for all of the old people named Torstein to die :P
I'm 13, soon 14 years old, average graded, and extremely in love with my hair. Wait.. did I write that out loud?

But the theme for my post is Brits! Yes, the pint drinking, noisy, bald brits! these lovely people are my favourite kind of personalities. and that's not even considering the language and slang! I bet there are like 1002 words for queer in English! And there is of course the other kind of brits. the kind and cheeky species, that is all fun to talk to and hang out with. good examples of these are Foss, and Josh. I only know them through Tora, but still, they are after my opinion "perfect" brits.
British is also the best language for making twisted and fun insults!

My favourite insult is to skinheads (quoting from Black Books) ;
"When you guys do your usual threesome thingy in the weekends, and the moonlight bounces off you heads 'n arses, doesn't that get a bit confusing?"

Well.. I hope that sums up the lot about brits. I will most likely write more posts in the future, so till then: HOLD ON 'YER TROUSERS! "cough"

Torstein
5

Gingerbread Rocket!

5  - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1 -- LIFT OFF!








Well I know it's not perfect, it's quite fat and it looks like a house, but I wont hear nothing about it. One of the sides is covered in licorice, but I forgot to take a picture of that, so I'll add it later! Guess we'll be spending Christmas eve on another planet! Pretty cool. huh?
The edge of space is naturally covered in sweets and otherwise made of plastic.
5

Post #770!

Yeah so it's been a bit of a bother to figure out what this years gingerbread creation was to be. I've made a truck, a lighthouse, a watermill and a vikingship previous years, so this year I was actually set on making a Swiss chalet. But then I figured that it would probably be quite boring, so I wanted to make a train.
But it's going to be a rocket. A spacerocket, a really plump one. Sooo-- I actually put it together last night, but I haven't decorated it yet. We'll see. 

In other news I'm listening to the new The Killers album "Day & Age". Err.. It's definitely different, that's for sure. They have found a new sound indeed. But if it works for sure I'll have to evaluate for a bit longer... Same goes for the new Razorlight album "Slipway Fires" which I think is just plain dull and also quite boring, but maybe it grows on me. Obviously I'm listening to Travis' "Ode to J. Smith" as well (which is their newest) but I have no clear opinion on that yet either. But new music is freshy-fresh, so maybe it'll be cool in the end. Who knows?!

Anyway, how are you?

2

The elementary particles of Christmas

Most people don't understand Christmas decorations. For some reason people have got this crazy idea that these are supposed to have some kind of resemblance with style or taste. Where did that crazy idea come from? That doesn't even make any sense! At all! Christmas is supposed to look like a mumbay taxi threw up Marie Antoinettes wardrobe into a baroque Christmas tree. Which would look something like this:

2

Time time time!

Gosh! It appears it is the eighth of December already. Where did the time go? It vanished! POP! Gone! Incredible that is, time, it always appears to be rushing by when we need it, and then when we're aware of it being there it's slow and gooey. What a spot of bother we twirled ourselves into when inventing time - or discovering time, I suppose (that would be more accurate). I could write something witty here, or something that could put a smile on your face for the rest of the day. Afraid I can't really think of anything to write - except that I saw Hairspray today, and it almost gave me a facelift because I almost threw up and so my face was upside down most of the time.

I still think Cristopher Walken is cool though, it is compulsive, I suppose.

6

Today it's snowing!

Omg snow!! It's so pretty and christmassy and you know, all that.
4

Looking for people with time

I've always loved to tell stories, and despite the fact that I have never really finished any of my started "works", I'm constantly thinking of stories or characters or ideas for twists and turns. This gets terrible bothersome after a while, so I have to sit down and jot the idea(s) down on paper in the form of a story. The problem is that I wear my eyes out on these things. I read, re-read, I edit, re-edit, I change something, remove lots, write a character out, add a new one, invent something, add a chapter or ten and so on and so on, but then I feel alienated from my own plot, right? I can no longer think of what's reasonable to happen next. And even if I DO create a disposition of the plot, everything I write just becomes unnatural. So I was wondering if I could call out for some assistance here, if only you would bother to read a page or maybe 26 or how many as you'd like and give me some feedback on it - I'd be in debt to you. Seriously. Because I get stuck and it's annoying because I really want to finish my stories!

Here are the beginnings of the four ones I am having particular trouble with, see if you can find one that is appealing in one way or the other and let me know, and I'll let you read the full story. I wont publish it here because it would be a dangerously long wall of text.

Pretty please?

"P Lot" - 7 pages
Eve worked in a large shopping mart. Every single morning, when the sun was still a pinkish haze through the pollution -she drove the short route through the concrete maze and parked in front of the neon-flashing chaos that was the liquor store. With the click of worn, cheap shoes she strode over the vast parking lot and around to the back of the mart, where it smelled rotten and fishy. The following bit she never remembered, because she was usually too tired. But before she knew it she was seated beneath the penetrating ceiling lights of Shop Smart Super Mart, bipping groceries past the cashier and watching people fumble for their wallets.
In addition to getting half an hour for lunch, five minutes for smokes and special offers on Shop Smart Super Mart’s own brand products (like the “Smart Shopping Super Easy Chicken Pastry Pasties 0.79$” and such) – she also got to wear their striped, red uniform. And she had been particularly lucky to get one that was at least two sizes too big, and a little stiff. So when she sat down by the cashier it looked like she was wearing a striped, red tent with “It Makes Sense to Be Smart - Choose Super Mart™” printed on the back.

"AGXH - 3" - 36 pages
”This swamp is disgusting!” she hollered to nobody in particular. She stood to her knees in the semi-yellow, slimey substances that covered the surface underneath the low ferns and the stalked flowers enveloping the misty wetness of the planet Schloorg. With much difficulty she managed to haul herself up from the sucking mass that bubbled with mysterious appetite. Small insects whirred and zoomed in and out of sight in the clampy mist. The sky was grey and empty, though still – mostly wet. Her shiny spaceship stood parked some way off, she had managed to steer it down on a patch of ground that didn’t immediately sink into the muddy masses below. Her cook, Flatch Estavado was unsuccessfully attempting to pick an eggplant-like vegetable from through an open window in the ship. -“Captain!” He shouted, though the fog seemed to devour most of the sound. “Captain! The- what is that?- Eew! –The roasted Uqail is ready!” He tried to shake off the pink slime that had covered his arm when the eggplant had exploded without warning.

"Forever Autumn" - 44 pages
It was at the dodgy end of Begonia lane, the lane edged with pumpkin patches and old, crooked oaks. The worn down, muddy street in the district of continuous autumn, where the crisp, dry leaves from the trees always flutter aimlessly in the wind.
In Forever Autumn the trees blush in fiery colours, wilt, then blush again – without ever sprouting or blooming. You see, this is because Forever-Autumn is the origin of everything that represents autumn and reflects the image of the world’s way to display the process from summer to winter. There is never summer in Forever-Autumn, there is no spring, no time for blossoming flowers and bird song. Forever-Autumn has no winter either, no frost, no snow, no starry clear winter nights and, there is never Christmas. All year around the trees will grow leaves that are already golden or red, apples will appear on the branches - though no flowers will have to blossom first, the pumpkins are always fat and reap and the crops a glistening yellow. None of the farmers ever have to plough or plant, the crops will appear over-night, and if they are not harvested, they will just stay there, nobody knows for how long, nobody have dared to test it.

"Maid in Buttermilk" - 4 pages
In a little dip between the fields lay a brick house. It was surrounded by blooming roses, purple and white lilac and some little scarlet begonias, all this foliage, the fuzzed, uncut lawn and the house were confined by a low stone fence. A warm June sun embraced this ripe summer afternoon and covered the landscape like golden drapes. The brick house was what by size I assume you’d call a small villa, or a minuscule mansion, because it was quite a pleasurable rust red size to it. You could tell from outside that most of the wobbly old windows had white lace curtains on the inside, and traditional, clean shutters neatly bolted on to the exteriority. All in all it was a very delicious countryside home, all heartily and delicately luscious.
2

Tuesday and tea


Another picture from Lisbon!

Today it's the second day in December. There's a little snow outside, I have hot gold tea and a lecture on Java. I dreamt I had both my feet in a stainless steel bowl tucked tightly with woolen socks, then I hopped over to a shop, and in the exhibition window there was a squid in a dress, she was black and white with a big red dress. Coming to think of it the window was more like an aquarium.

My eyes are all dry and tired even though my day has only just started! It is a good day so far, though.
12

What makes you sad just by thinking about it?


I took this picture in Lisbon last week.

Forgive me for not updating. It's not that I have so many things to do, it is just that I'm spending my time elaborately avoiding to do them. I wanted to make a post about sadness because Scandinavia can be a very depressing place at this time of year. Sure it is Christmas, but it is also extremely dark and cold. It's dark when you get up and dark when you come home. People are saddened by many things, loneliness, darkness, films, books, music - could be whatever. I just wanted to know what makes you sad.

These things I have listed below make me above averagely sad just by thinking about them, you'll probably have me in tears by the end of this post.

Bits in films that make me cry excessively: 

That part in Fur, when Diane tries to breathe in the air that late Lionel blew into the inflatable mattress.
The ending of Bin Jip when Sun-Wha and Tae-Suk are weightless when standing together on the scale.
When all the Who's in Horton Hears a Who try to make enough noise to save themselves.
In Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, when Master Li Mu Bai and Yu Shu Lien, dying admit they have always loved each other.
The flashbacks in Dead Mans Shoes. (Definitely one of the best films I've ever seen, I'm not going to link to it, because it's best to not know anything about it and just see it!)
When All Cats Are Grey by The Cure starts to play in Marie Antoinette
When Kunlun starts to run wearing the cape of Snow Wolf in The Promise.
When Donnie and Gretchen are separated in Donnie Darko
When Jin sings to Xiao Mei while holding her in his arms in the snow in House of Flying Daggers.
When the messenger is waving the flag of failure in Hero.

Songs that makes me cry:
(Even just by hearing a snippet!)

Your Eyes Open by Keane.
Silent Sigh by Badly Drawn Boy.
O Mio Bambino Caro (Puccini) sung by Renee Fleming.
Green Eyes by Coldplay.
Any song Thomas Dybdahl has ever made, especially Henry.
Freedom of the Wa by Klaus Badelt.
The Man Who Flew Away by Husky Rescue.
Curves by Röyksopp.
Pulling Our Weight by The Radio Department.
The Drugs Don't Work by The Verve.

Books that make me cry:

Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiKamillo and Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes, every flippin single time I read them. There are tons of other books that makes me cry, but these two books can make my bottom lip quiver just by thinking about them. 

Not to forget these three films that leaves me a little smudgy pulp with swollen eyes for several weeks at a time: ,
JunoBambi and Dumbo

I am extremely easily affected by these kind of things, and I believe that to be the reason why I'm almost always happy! All the above genuinely makes me sad and I can end up crying myself to sleep, but by the time I get over it (either by heavy Sean The Sheep or Knudsen & Ludvigsen therapy) I feel so light it's as if I could fly away any moment. Crying about one thing is a great way to get rid of other emotional luggage that is already in the system I suppose!
6

I'm off, you cheese!

Hello beautiful people. I am in Portugal by the time you read this, visiting my sister with my brother and most of my lovely grandparents. It'll be a blast and I'll be back Wednesday! TOODLEDOO!

Busy busy

In the middle of our group-exam this week. It is actually really stressing. Thank God I'll be done by Friday! Until then - I guess I wont blog much, sorry - if it upsets you. Boing!

7

Delicious cream


Cream is one of the chemical elements, positioned on the periodic table next to potassium, underneath sauce. And that is a FACT.

Margarine is the enemy, never forget that!

And it doesn't look like this outside at all. When is it going to snow again?
0

Mi mi mi miii

More music. The Black Ghosts. Anyway You Choose To Give It.

Go listen
3

Does It Offend You, Yeah?

Today I made the delightful discovery of Does It Offend You, Yeah? It's like a fresh breath into my musicworld at the time! It's like Klaxons meeting a Daft Punk/Justice fusion mixed with Melody Club or something, yeah - with a whiff of Gorillaz I think it is? Sounds offensive? Sounds great! My favourites so far are Epic Last Song and Being Bad Feels Really Good. But I mean Attack of The 60ft Lesbian Octupus is obviously awesome, and what is so weird is that the title really goes excellent with the song!

In other news I'm desperately trying to write my NaNovel even though it's pointless because I don't really have the time to. But right now I'm fussing about it and it takes my mind of other things I'd rather not think about, so it's like therapy. The story is becoming quite interesting actually, or I think it is at least. 

The cast consists of a homocidal chick named Captain Lya Holotata, her chef Flatch, a kidnapped ex-slave/ex-soldier named Pent, a mystical messanger in shades named Vauce that smokes all the time, a man that shifts from being duck to being man, named Duckman. And then there is a mysterious spaceshipwreck and a lot of food and a piece of italian cake that needs to be delivered before the Happy Glow Festival. There is also a robot in the branch of public transport willing to cross universes to give back the proper amount of change.

It's stupid but it all makes sense, because it's NaNoWriMo and everybody's doing it and nobody really cares what anyone else is writing about because they all just want to talk about their own novel - like I'm doing now. And that makes sense too, because it takes my mind off things, but then it kind of stays there - in the novel, still. 16 094 words and counting. You may follow me here if you have nothing better to do. (Forgive the long post, it's NaNo-Syndrome).
0

Circulation of the blood

I have been told that I totally fail at putting clothes on. A person I consider a friend, or - something along the lines of friend even made a remark on it. It's not that I'm any better at taking them off (ha. ha.) it just seems I had to have been asleep when everyone else learnt how to put their clothes on in an intelligent way. I'm however convinced that I'm better at it than the average person with a retardation, but then they are probably a lot better at a lot of things I also suck at.

I don't know why I'm blogging about this. But I'm trying to write a NaNovel originally, and so I did a handstand to get some blood to my headbrain (seeing otherwise I'm just sitting on my behind, and it doesn't exactly encourage any circulation). And then I went back to the computer, and now I'm writing this. Ehm yeah, you can make whatever you want of that. Maybe I got a concussion.

On the other hand, too much blood might have given me a concussion.

(got it?)
4

Remember remember, the fifth of November!

Wooot! That's today. Guy Fawkes Night, Bonfire Night, Cracker Night or Fireworks Night.

I don't have any plans along the lines of that at all.
9

Axolotl and the rain

All the snow is raining away today, like expected. But it was a good thing that we got a lot of snow as a warning for winter. Because as usual everybody are totally unprepared for snow. Cars and people sliding about on the ice just like Bambi, and whining about how cold it is.

But now we have got a taste of winter, people will recall what snow is like every year, and so we have some time to unpack our giant coats, the boots, the hats, the mittens and the spiky tyres, right? I blew my nose in a napkin, but it was full of cinnamon, now my head feels weird.


For some reason I ended up looking at pictures of Mudkips today, and randomly I cam across this creature called Axolotl. I didn't even know there was a creature named Axolotl. But I like it. It is on the brink of extinction though, but I hope it survives. It looks nice, doesn't it? It has a friendly face.

First snow!

The first snow fell last night! So beautiful, the sounds are all muffled by a soft whiteness. In Norway we have a "saying" about the first snow. And it goes something like this: "It has to snow seven times before the snow settles" (or stays, you know - not melt away again). It's not always true obviously, but the first snow is rarely permanent.

Elin gave me a star shaped egg pan, so Skjalg and I had a star shaped egg for breakfast.

On Friday Hans-Jørgen gave me a bouquet of roses!
I am such a lucky person!
14

Inside out the outside in

I think it is a problem how strangers' looks never reflect their personality. Like whenever you meet a really beautiful girl - and you're thinking "Wow! She looks amazing!" and you start chatting her up, but turns out she is totally not confident about making jokes. Game over!

Because I believe to have perceived a certain link between people that can be physically confident, while at the same time not having the self esteem to mock themselves. When I say someone is physically confident I mean that their good looks probably have provided them with admiration and likely also a high social status in their network. BUT, and there is quite a big but here, - surviving on looks does not secure this character's social position. They can be made to believe that they have to take themselves seriously to be admired, and that is the immediate moment when they go from stunningly sexy to boring, insecure and uninteresting.

And it is so typical, because all the quirky, fun people I know I think of as beautiful. Seeing as I know them, their outsides are reflections of their insides (not saying the quirky people I know are ugly unless you know them XD). But they are nourishing to any situation. And you always end up chatting up the most likely attractive person - which time has shown; is also the most dull.
0

Long time, no Seal!

Yeah, so sorry about that. I have totally been neglecting this blog for the last couple of days, which is terrible of me - I'm sure. Not necessarily because my little submissions were to be missed, but because it is dangerous for me to lose my blogging rythm. It makes me lazy and takes ages to retrieve.

I was at my second Justice concert last wednesday, it was quite good. The audience were certainly prepared recepticals for any sound the French duo were willing to blast out of their speakers. Personally I think the peak of the concert was when they quite brutally mashed "You're No Good for Me" by the Prodigy in to their beats. That was fabulous. Also I wore a sure deathtrap that easily entangled itself into any passing creature, so dancing was much like "avoiding", which is common in Norway, because it is so full of Swedes. Either way, every feminine particle in my body can be proud of me wearing a dress - because I'm not too good at that. And my wonderful, sparkling shoes reduced my feet to a pulpy sludge of blood and flesh.

Saturday we went to see everybody again at Eivind's place, and I had alcohol for the first time in several months*. It is so nice to catch up with everyone, and Elin is back from England and Ulrik back for a bit from the Army and you know - it was really nice. Also there were new people to meet and I had a rather dramatic misunderstanding up on the roof-terrace. All in all I had too much Urge and too much alcohol and then I walked Elin home and I was in bed about 5 in the morning.

Needless to say I had the hangover of centuries (again, so unfair I always get them. I think someone out there is secretly sending their pain to me, so I get double the trouble). But honestly, there is a reason why I'm not a hard drinker (usually!) because I just fall asleep, or if I manage to stay awake (which takes endless amounts of caffeine) I am so fragile the next day I almost have to take a few days off.

Speaking of which I am being such a good girl and working out, the problem is that I work out on Mondays and then my muscles are horribly sore until the following Friday. Seeing I am a lazy bastard and couldn't even consider working out during the weekend - I start off at Monday again. Even though I am paying for working out the entire month, I only get to do it once a week. Hopefully it will change though, and I'll become Superstrongmonsterwoman and I'll kick your sorry ass back to 1991! Which is a mean place to end up - you'll have to wear tights!

The weather is quite mild, I'm really eagerly anticipating December and the snow, even though November is going to be a tough one. Scored well on my Java hand-in, but have another one on Friday which is smaller but a lot harder, and I'm not very keen on spending a lot of time on it because it just doesn't feel rewarding! But I'm working on that, I really want to like it, it is just hard to do so.

This has turned into the longest post ever, and also one of the most pointless posts ever. Make whatever you wish of it, I'm publising it now. Oh, and I think I'm brewing up a cold, I'm sneezing into my tea!

*meaning alcohol in the common, vast quantities that the Scandinavian drinking culture requires.

Speaking of which

"If you do find a girlfriend who already loves video games... keep her. "
You will find this to be my point exactly!

I just randomly skimmed through that, it was a very comforting read to be honest. It is like the perfect proof of that guys also "ease" their girlfriends into doing as they want. The patience and smoothness executed by the authors of this article however - might be rare.

Also, I discovered that there is actually such a thing as http://www.missvideogame.com/
- Miss Video Game! Now there's a title! I don't think having a pageant is going to "incorporate girls and women into the gaming culture and industry", I think that is just emphasising that female gamers often are looked down upon. I tried googling "Mister Video Game", but all I found was Mister Slime for Nintendo DS.
2

One, two, Tea!

I think I might be drinking too much tea. Mum wont let me buy anymore, so I have to drink up all the different varietes I have first. It is not THAT many though, but I thought I'd list them here to tell you which ones are the best. Also I smelled a tea the other day in a shop, and the tea was called Mexican Mango. Incredibly exotic, I know - and it smelled absolutely amazing too. In Norway there are pretty much two brands of tea, it's Lipton and Twinings. There are obviously loads more if you go in a special tea/coffee shop, but they cost shitloads. It doesn't cost to just go inside and smell all the different blends though. That's like one of my favourite things to do.

If you wonder what on earth this entire post is about, it's about tea. But I have caught a nasty case of NaNoWriMo again, so you will find my posts to be unecessary long and winding. Just look at my review of Keane's "Perfect Symmetry" - it is like a huuuge wall of deadly text. Yarp! But anyway, point is - Lipton and Twinings kind of dominate the grocery stores, and they keep inventing flavours that don't exist and put them in very nice packages. Like pyramid shaped teabags and stuff like that, it is pretty crazy. I fall for it though. I buy things for their wrapper all the time.

Lipton's White Tea
I think I have been scammed, it is just ordinary black tea with some white bits in it. It tastes nice however - I'm not complaining.

Lipton's Gold Tea
Now this is definitely a scam, it comes in a really sexy black and gold box that has absolutely nothing to do with tea. But I brought that on myself, because this is just black tea with yellow bits in it, I know - wow. Definitely just a bland blend of tea named Gold, and so I fall for it immediately. But it's good too, so hey! What do you know?

Lipton's Tropical Fruit Tea
Ever had like tropical fruit yoghurt, and then spilled it in your Earl Gray tea? Well this tastes exactly like that. But in a good way, at least I think it is in a good way.

Twining's Green Tea with Lemon
Tastes like lemon, smells like lemon, -then a bit like a rabbit's cage. Delicious though.

Twining's Green Tea with Jasmine
This is very sweet in flavour, and the fragrance is very heavy. Though I'd expect that's what to happen when you put the remnants of wilted flowers in a cup of boiling water. AND DRINK IT! Who invented this, I will never understand. But I am grateful.

Twining's Green Tea with Mint
Hah, this'd be my favourite, it is like you're brushing your teeth and swallowing something hot at the same time. Sounds gross - is excellent! You'd be surprised.

Twining's Earl Gray
What can I say? Nothing to say. Always liked Earl Gray. Lipton's Yellow Label on the other hand - is just not my cup of tea! (oh, see what I did there?)

SörgårdsTe (that's southerns farm tea, from Sweden)
It tastes like passion fruit, but it doesn't have anything to do with any farm in southern Sweden as far as I get it. And I don't think they grow any passionfruit there either. But then I am sceptical to Swedes y'know, I don't trust them, can't help it! I'm Norwegian. So forgive me, I like you, but I don't trust you.

Himlagott
(Heavenly good/Divine, also Swedish, in Norwegian it would be "Himla godt", at least you could say that, but in writing it looks weird). And this is very interesting, because on the bag it says it has a flavour of "Kvitten" (whatever that is), peach and cream. I know! Peaches and cream and "Kvitten" flavoured tea. Far out! Smells heavenly, as described. ... Hmmm - Maybe Kvitten is like a bird? Could be a bird. Sounds a bit like a bird. I think it is a bird. Like Bird, peaches and cream tea. Ooh. Yum.

Twining's Blackcurrant Tea
Wow, surprisingly this tastes like blackcurrant, and there is really nothing more to say about that. When I drink from my tea-bottle on my way to school it makes the entire bus smell like blackcurrant. I can sit and panorama the tired people's nostrils vibrate as the scents unfolds. it is most tasty.

Twining's Apple, Cinnamon & Raisin Tea
This is great! I can't have more than like a bottle a day though, because it tastes just like its description, so it's like drinking a pie. And it is like an illusion of feeling full afterwards. (note: illusion).

(Please listen to Keane's - You Haven't Told Me Anything. It makes me want to dance around and smile like an idiot). Also when I move out I want to have like a really tacky and ugly teapot like that, I'd just totally love that!
0

Blog Action Day '08

I've been thinking a lot about blog action day, especially since it's about poverty this year. And I suppose we all get to taste the meaning of that word these days, because we are more or less surrounded with poverty in different apparitions. The western world has also received a blow economically and people we know - or even ourselves get to experience how much it means to be pinchy on our wallets. Obviously, there is more to poverty than not affording to go to the hairdresser, it means having to go through desperate measures to survive every day. Money is so incredibly important, as important as we have made it to be.

And it isn't any wonder that money is as important as it is today, everyone can see that. It is much like food, really - if some of us weren't so greedy, it'd be plenty to go around. But I'm afraid humans don't work like that, and even though everyone wants to contribute - not many follow through.

I don't want to lecture about people being bad and horrible and that we are leaving thousands of our fellow specimen to starve to death every day. Because we know that, something which maybe even makes it worse, I suppose - but my point being that instead of telling us things we are already painfully aware off, I just wanted to encourage you to help.

Today being today - Blog Action Day, I want to spread the word of Change.org in association with Blog Action Day - and you can donate whatever petty amount of money - because it will make a difference to someone out there.

To you and me a small sum of money will mean more or less a pair of socks or a computergame or maybe even lunch. If you are willing to let go of your flippin lunch for the sake of some frightened, malnutritioned skeleton somewhere in the world - that is a beautiful action. I take my hat off for you. If you'd like to learn more about poverty, Foss' written about it in his blog. And so has Elin.

0

Keane - Perfect Symmetry

Yay it's 72 days until Christmas!
And 20 days until I'm going to the Keane concert.
3 days until my first exam.
And 1 day since Keane's newest album, "Perfect Symmetry" officially released. I mean, it's been on the internet for yonks, but now I have it here, in it's sweet, shiny cover. So I'll tell you about it.

I have had "Perfect Symmetry" on repeat ever since I got it in my possession a mere 24 hours ago. And I will initiate my review by saying that I don't like the four last tracks on the album. They're okay, I guess - but they aren't as ambitious and (well, actually "Black Burning Heart" is SO ambitious that it totally backfires on itself) energetic as the seven first tracks.

Their release single "Spiralling" is definately one of the strongest elements on this album. The song "Perfect Symmetry" is pompous and audiably challenging, but is sung with all the force and power that is required to emphasise the quite dramatic lyrics is has, like: "I wish I could make sense of what we do/ Burning down the capitals/ The wisest of the animals". But don't get me wrong, it is a really good song.

"The Lovers Are Losing" and "You Haven't Told Me Anything" are by far my favourites. They are worth purchasing the entire album for. Especially when the album contains "Better Than This", "Again and Again", and "You Don't See Me". --Erhm, yeah, you will find to your grand surprise that I have just listed the first seven tracks on the album. But like I said in the beginning - they're brilliant, and well produced and original yet still Keane'y! One other important thing is that this album is way more upbeat, playful and almost funky. You can dance to this!

Keane has always had good lyrics and this album is definitely no exception, they may sometimes be a little too philosophical though, you know, it gets so emotional and soulful that it doesn't even make any sense anymore. "I wish that I could be/ In the cellars of the sea/ And disappear in them/ Never to be seen again". Like what exactly is an ocean's cellar? This might be a very naïve question, I love artists with random lyrics. I am not sure though, because in "Black Burning Heart" the above phrase is followed by verses like "If we could turn back/ You can paper over the crack/ But it will return now/ And your heart will burn black" and so the song goes back to making sense in accordance with the title, but loses it's meaning as an entity. (There is also a strophe read in French in "Black Burning Heart", which is probably the major reason why I don't like this song. It tries to be something that it's not, and the biggest problem with that is that it is trying to be something it shouldn't want to be! If that makes any sense to you. It strives for something that is undesirable. Right? They have proved that they can give their songs perfect and wonderful sense in English. Well instead of going completely spastic over something as insignificant as mere 16 French words in track 10, I'll move on.)

Like stated, Keane have accomplished to record another great album that I already love a lot. It is not their best so far, it is nothing FANTASTICALLY BRILLIANT when it is compared to other bands I suppose. But for being Keane this was very daring of them. They have played a lot with the different spectres of sound and polished them (if you listen carefully there are like a gazillion different sounds that build up quite basic melodies) so that it isn't noisy. Well perhaps except from in "Playing Around" which keeps hollering "Turn up the volume!" but that never quite kicks off, so you don't want to turn the volume up at all.


Obviously, I can't finish this review without mentioning the amazing vocals of Tom Chaplin. He has an amazing voice.

Compared to "Under The Iron Sea" - "Perfect Symmetry" doesn't have a significant wholeness about it. You don't necessarily need the entire album to understand how wonderful it is, but listening to it over and over makes it grow on you eventually.
Like Keane always does.

I loved it, thank you!
7

Sunday!

It is getting SO cold!

Brr!

How is everyone, anyway?

I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it. - Rita Mae Brown
7

Gratulerer med dagen Ask!


Hurra for Ask!

NaNo Help!

Our friend Mikee took this picture at Ibiza, these poor brits had collapsed in the sun, probably a little drugged or drunk or hungover or something. At least they don't look too well. I've been laughing at this picture on facebook for ages, so I thought I'd share it with the outside world. Like, outside facebook. Whatever world that is.

Today the weather's been exceptionally grim, and there isn't much beauty left in the rotting leaves either. Well it's still nice colours and stuff, but now it is turning a lot more -- brown. If you know what I mean..

Well to the point, I'd be extremely grateful for any NaNoWriMo ideas. Because it'll start in November, but because of all the assignments we get after each lecture, and our massive group-exam - I really need to get a headstart I'm afraid. It sucks a little, but then I'd still be writing a NaNo, it is just that because of the circumstances I have to start up a little earlier.
10

Hurry!

Every girl that is additionally a geek never remains single for very long. It's true. It is like the second a guy gets the notion some girl has a mere fraction of nerdness about her - she gets snapped up even before she can say "LOL!".
Which is interesting, and probably due to the fact that nerd girls have a reduced defense system. First of all they are probably not used to the idea of being attractive to someone, which means they are not prepared (YOU ARE NOT PREPARED! (or, you know what I mean). And secondly, they are probably so busy gaming they rarely even realize that they have entered a relationship.

And this is quite normal, just think about it. It makes sense. How many remotely sane gaming girls do you know that is single? (Well, I could actually think of a few right now, but all of these chicks are either stationed somewhere in the farthers corners of uncivilized Snoreway, or in fact too fast). Which is a gift. If you are able to run away soon enough - you'll be alright. Or, you could always just move to somewhere safe. Like the moon, or Yemen, or somewhere you have to wear either a full-bodysuit or -grow a beard, which could be either of the two places.
0

Happy Birthday Kristin!


Yay!

Life!

I recently got a long awaited e-mail from Smy, the brilliant author of Fascinating Fishtank. And it is a delight to tell you that he is in fact still alive.
And that is a hazard with most of these internet-people, because if one suddenly die - their blog will just stop being updated, and you wont ever know what happened, do you?

So, technically, we should all leave a document in our will that contains all our internet identities - so everyone out there will know that game's over, or that you have just migrated to Spain, and not likely to return very soon. That is similar to death, just a bit saltier.

It is getting increasingly colder, and all the leaves are tumbling around in their Euro-pride colours - except purple though (a weakness with this comparison, as I assume purple and pink are likely to be the most proud colours, right?). At least that is how they spotted them in the old days, Apothecary Peter Urpal, Doctor Pollywoth Ink, Gareth A. Yew and such. It is said that they were born more prominently "askew" - so they could immediately name them befitting their preferences.
Also I'm all out of tea, and I am hungry. And yesterday Cleo almost went for a swim when I threw a stick into the river, but to be fair she just waded out, got the stick, and then pounced out of the water as quick as she could. In other news - I played Age of Conan on Saturday, I'll tell you all about it later, if you want.
2

Javajava

You better like the Java! Because I'm stuck with it!

It actually makes me shiver a little. It is confusing and logical at the same time. And at the moment it's hard to understand anything at all - so hopefully I'll be able to start understanding Java, instead of just accepting it for being what it is.


Nonetheless, it's nice to learn new things. Also received an uplifting email from my sister, Sigrid - who is currently studying in Lisbon. I am so glad she is well, even though I envy her loads.
If you have any idea on what I should be writing for this years' NaNoWriMo I'd be very grateful. Because I'm going to have to do some brainstorming for a headstart because of all my exams and the hand-ins during November.
Oh! And this is my SPORE made shrimp!

2

Uncyclopedia on Norway

"Norway exists primarily to prevent Sweden and Finland from looking like a cock and balls on the map. "
- http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Norway

“Wow! Norway sounds like a whack to the pants!”
~ Oscar Wilde

Psychonauts

Have you ever played Psychonauts? It is an incredibly awesome game. If you liked Curse of Monkey Island and Grim Fandago or perhaps even more active adventuregames like Banjo Kazooie - you'll love this. It is based on an idea by Tim Schafer (yes, the same brainface that did both Grim Fandango and the Monkey Island Curse game). The atmosphere and humour of this wonderful ditty is captivating. It's dark and gloomy, but at the same time brilliantly colourful and witty. Gogo! Go buy it now.

You play the ex-circus boy, now Psychonaut named Razputin (Raz). It all takes place at the Psychic Summer Camp for kids, but this is no ordinary summer camp, and it also turns out quite eventful when all the other psychic kids gets their brains taken from them. The plot may sound crazy (and it is!) - because it's up to you to retrieve them. So the game mostly happens inside people's minds, where you have to tag emotional luggage (crying suitcases), figments of their imagination and use your many abilities, like clairvoyance, telekinesis and levitation to solve complex puzzles and destroy freaky enemies. Like the mutated lungfish, the crazy bull El Odio, or the milkman.

I love this game, it is such a delight. Like a rainbow toffee in a bowl of pebbles. By that I mean that it is an intruiging game among all these mass-produced first player shooting, war, football, sing-a-long, or movieplot based games. Thumbs up!

Now:

Listen to: Keane - Something In Me Was Dying

Play: Psychonauts

Eat: Chocolate chunk muffins

7

Working out! The poll, the conclusion

So, there it is! The time has elapsed, the votes are closed - the result is ready. But before I proceed with the conclusion I have something on my mind (of relevance, actually).

Because it has come to my attention that a certain person has spent time resetting her/his IP address to apply multiple votes to The Work Out! poll. I am not a person to take myself seriously at all, but being a democratic soul in the shell of an idiot - I'd like to proclaim the poll to be a faux. It is, in other words - not going to be very relevant to my final decision. And that is the conclusion! Thanks for sharing your opinion, Gladys The Gallbladder fiend. I am sure your mind is wise.


0

My room

Now in English further down!

Ser ut som et bombet likhus, ispedd kreperende rester av forgrepne klovner og resultatet av en rekke uforklarlige hendelser som antageligvis innebar en eske med sminke, femten meter teip, en boks kvitteringer, en samling CD'er uten cover, unbegrensede mengder klær, merkverdige glitrende objekter og små hårete vesener med lystige personligheter og appetitt på kalde rester av teposer og blyantspiss. Det hele kanskje med en slags atmosfære av en fanget kunstnerisk sjel som spontant var nødt til å gå i håndgemeng med hele sin portfolio og endte opp revet i fillebiter under en kontorstol, dekket av glitter.

Det er et sørgelig syn. Men det er også sant.

Looks like a bombed morgue, with the crippled rests of violated clowns added, and the result of a series of unexplainable events that were likely to involve a box of makeup, fifteen metres of stickytape, a box of receipts, a collection of coverless CD's, unlimited amounts of clothes, mysterious glittering objects and small, hairy creatures with an appetite for the cold remnants of teabags and pencil sharpenings. The whole of it perhaps with a kind of atmosphere of a trapped artistic soul that spontaneously had to go to physical measures with his/hers entire portfolio, and ended up ripped to shreds under an office chair, covered in glitter.

It is a sad sight. But it is true also.
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